Advice from the stars! with Gizmo Dizmal

ASK DR. GIZMO

Dear Dr. Gizmo,
This is kind of embarrassing, but I have to ask somebody. I have developed a case of genital warts, and they seem to be spelling out a message… in letters. I have a product that will make them go away within 24 hours, but I can’t decide whether I should use it or not. Is this a message from the divine, or am I going bananas? I’ve got the letters B and A so far, although the B might be an 8.

‘Nanners in Panama City

Dear ‘Nanners,

You’re trying to make the best of your situation, and who can blame you? Who wouldn’t want their STI to at least do something productive once in a while?  I think you should  wait it out until you get a few more letters.  A distinct possibility remains that the message may lead you to buried treasure.  If it looks like a bible verse or something, then by all means, get the cream out.  Let the divine reach via other avenues… I recommend a strict diet of alphabet-oriented cereals and soups.

Dear Gizmo,
I thought you were a fake astrologist, but now you’re a fake doctor? You’re so weird!
Muffy in Moosetown

Yes, Muffy, I received my fake degree from a fake university in a location that was similarly fabricated. Although I do like to make collages from anatomy books, I didn’t have the bread necessary for Med school.  What this means to you, however, is that I can still provide real advice of the most imaginative caliber to you, Muffy-moo.

Dr. Gizmo can be reached at afack@iusb.edu for all your medical mysteries.

“Progress takes patience, and some effort”

Eric A. Gingerich
Staff Writer

Waiting kills me. Waiting for a callback, waiting to get time off—it doesn’t matter. I prefer things—whatever they are—to happen. So I tend to forget that waiting doesn’t necessarily mean stagnation; it simply means you must be patient.

The bank was a pleasant detour on my way to the airport. All the nervous glancing at the teller finally amounted to something: small talk. Afterward, a pop song played on the radio as I drove to work, and I sang along. I sang along because of progression.

A month ago I stumbled on the perfect job in New York. Designed for students graduating this spring and made for individuals with a desire to learn, I became determined to write the best resume and cover letter. Don’t be fooled; this is no simple task. Like anything else, start early and don’t fear critical feedback.

In my patience, here is what I’ve learned: Days that start badly can slowly get better. My mind can do more harm than good, creating worst-case scenarios. Yet like bad days becoming good, reality reveals itself, and it is not what you expect. Finally, if life is taken in stride and your eyes are in front of you, you forget you’re waiting and start to actually plan your future as you see it.

I’m on a flight to Philadelphia and Thursday I’ll be in New York City. The plane rushes forward; my body presses into the seat. Everything comes together one way or another. There is movement, and it’s inevitable. So let us move.

Smoking Ban at IUSB

Dear Editor,

The proposed smoking ban at IUSB (or any campus) is ridiculous! 
Smoking is no longer a politically correct thing to do; therefore, the University
feels it must take the issue upon itself to somehow make better the world,
one stupid rule after another.  I speak without bias, as I am not a smoker,
nor is anyone in my home.  Beyond political correctness, where is the
justification for such a rule?  No one would dream of smoking indoors. 
And smoking outdoors?  Yes, I admit to holding my own breath when I exit a
building on campus, but is that really any more harmful than breathing
in exhaust fumes when walking through the parking lot?  But one would
still be allowed to smoke in his or her car.  Do you think they are going to
keep their windows rolled up when they do their smoking?

So often the University is concerned with protecting the individual
Freedoms of speech, which students are supposed to possess, but what about
Unpopular freedoms like smoking?  Smoking is not illegal.  When smoking was
banned in so many places in Chicago, everyone jokingly said, “What’s next?  Are
they going to ban fatty foods?” not realizing that such a ban was in the
works. No longer can a restaurant in Chicago sell foie gras, one of the most
famous delicacies of French cuisine, because certain people in power have
deemed fattening ducks and geese as inhumane treatment. Whether it is inhumane
or not is simply a personal opinion; it has not been made illegal. Being
force-fed seems kinder than being killed.  But perhaps, that’s next. 
So before you support a ban on something that doesn’t seem to affect you,

Think hard about the greater significance that comes from giving up your
individual freedoms to some University administrator with an unforeseen
agenda.

Talia Reed

The Search is Over

Michael A. McRobbie appointed new IU President
Jason Overholt
Staff Writer

On March 1, The Trustees of Indiana University unanimously decided on the appointment of Michael A. McRobbie as new president of the Indiana University system.
Of specific relevance to IUSB is that Mike Renfrow, former president of its student government, was controversially chosen to be the only student member of the IU Presidential Search Committee.
In the process, he had to represent all 98,000 students in the IU system, so he didn’t want any distractions.
 “As diverse and complex as IU is, it was a tough job. When I got that assignment, I felt like I couldn’t do that and stay on as student president at the same time.” Said Renfrow, explaining why he resigned in his third term post as president of IUSB’s student government.
Renfrow was appointed by the All University Student Association (AUSA) to be on the search committee. AUSA, which is a conglomeration of the leaders of the various IU student governments, based there decision on Renfrow’s credentials and experience, which were unmatched among his peers.
It was still a controversial decision, because some students in Bloomington, IU’s “flagship” campus, were afraid that Renfrow would put too much emphasis on the needs of regional schools. IUB has many student run institutions that would require a president who is willing to support them, and work with them.  
To gain their trust, Renfrow spent two days on the IUB campus talking to students. He also traveled to many of the regional campuses to do the same.
“The way I approached it was as a two prong process. I looked at the things that Bloomington specifically wanted in a president, and the things that regional campuses would want. The president holds the title of president of the university system as a whole, but he also holds the title of what is basically the CEO of Bloomington,” He said.
The search committee made sure that they looked for candidates who would also keep in mind the mission of regional schools. Renfrew expressed his belief in how important these institutions are for people who might not be able to receive a quality, higher education in their localities.
“We wanted someone that understands that a healthy regional system is healthy for Bloomington as well,” he said.
 It’s too early to know if the new president, McRobbie, will live up to these hopes.  However, even though he is from Bloomington, and some think he might not understand the problems of regional schools, the rest of his credentials are solid.
Among other accomplishments, McRobbie has held the position of IU’s vice president for information technology from 1997-2003, then vice president for research from 2003 to 2006 when he became the interim provost. He has also led the development of a high-speed, information-technology system linking all eight campuses, and in 2006 he worked out a deal with IBM to provide IU with a $9 million dollar supercomputer that is the fastest owned by any university in the nation.

IUSB Demographic: Who are the Students?

Terrie Phillips
Student News Editor

 We talk about diversity in our classes.  We see a variety of students in the mall area, the SAC, and pass them every day in the hallways.  Who are the students? 

The following data came from the Office of Institutional Research, http://www.iusb.edu/~iusboir, for the Spring Semester, 2007.  Currently there are 5,233 undergraduates here on campus, it is divided as follows; 1,546 freshmen, 1,349 sophomores, 920 juniors, 1,418 seniors.  In addition there are 731 graduates students.

There are 4,259 females and 2,493 males on campus.  There are 30 American Indian, 96 Asian, 457 Black, 245 Hispanic, 5,454 White, 190 International, and 280 unknowns. 

There has been a decrease by 14% for Asians, 2.2% for Whites, and 3.1% for International students.  Meanwhile there is an increase of American Indian by 20%, 4.8% increase for Black, Hispanics have increased by 20.1%. 

The campus has seen a recent shift in non traditional students to traditional in the past five years, said Jacqueline L. Caul, Ph.D., Vice Chancellor.  The school has recently hired Cynthia Murphy-Wardlow, “She was hired a few years ago to focus on the recruitment and counseling of Hispanic students,” said Caul.

“Since she’s been here we’ve had substantial increase in Hispanics, last year there was a 15% increase,” said Caul. 

Indiana University considers any undocumented alien that graduates from an Indiana high school an Indiana resident when it comes to tuition.  According to Caul there is program for undocumented aliens to fill out for financial aid called the Alternate Needs Assessment. 

There is a special program to recruit African Americans as well.  In the summer, for students just graduating from high school and students going into their senior year, there are classes in the summer they can attend.  “Summer Leadership Academy, there are 20-30 students,” said Caul.  For the graduated seniors the class gives them credit for W-130.  “Majority (of the graduated seniors) come here in the fall,” said Caul. 

The University has also implemented support programs to keep students in school.  “Retention numbers are good,” said Caul. 

Overall IUSB has seen an increase in traditional students, Hispanics and Blacks, and traditional students have stayed constant.  “After 9/11 we stayed very consistent,” said Caul.  With programs and recruitment efforts, the campus will soon be more diversified.  

New IU President Speaks With IUSB Students

Terrie Phillips
Student News Editor

 On Thursday March 8, 2007, Michael McRobbie Ph.D. spoke with students about his future as IU’s 18th President.

 McRobbie began his life at IU in January of 1997 as President of Information Technology and Chief Information Officer.  McRobbie was appointed to Interim Provost and Vice President for Academic Affairs for the Bloomington campus on January 14, 2006.

 “A native of Australia, Interim Provost McRobbie came to IU from the Institute of Advanced Study at the Australian National University, where he was a professor of information technology and CEO of the Cooperative Research Center for Advanced Computational Systems,” according to http://www.iub.edu/provost/bio.shtml.

 “I think the future, from everything I’ve heard and seen is rosy,” said McRobbie about IUSB’s future, “An area that seems to be prospering and growing.”

 The students asked questions from budget issues to research funding.  McRobbie said, “There’s no magic bullet when it comes to the budget.”

 McRobbie wanted to visit with students to get a feel for what issues are most important to the students on each campus.  “Frankly, my goal is to make IU a better institution,” said McRobbie. 

 McRobbie will take his seat as President on July 1st.  For more information on him you can visit his biography webpage at http://www.iub.edu/provost/bio.shtml.
 

43rd Robo-Pong St. Joseph Valley Open

Jason Cytacki
Editor-in-Chief

The sound of dozens of bouncing ping pong balls and the screeching of sneakers filled the SAC on March 17 and 18th. For the fourth consecutive year, the Annual St. Joseph Valley Open  Table Tennis tournament was hosted on the campus of IU South Bend.

Over the course of two days of ping pong battles, 231 participants will play.  According to Phil Schmucker, President of the South Bend Table Tennis Center, “This is the highest total we’ve had since we’ve been here.” 

Included is Mark Hazinski, a current U.S. Olympian and the number 1 player on the U.S. World Team.  Surprising to some, he like many others originated from the South Bend Table Tennis Club. 

South Bend has been a hotbed for ping pong players since the 1930’s. 

Originally conceived in 1935 at the YMCA downtown, the South Bend Club grew to levels of infamy across the nation.  “The whole country knew of South Bend through the South Bend Club” said Brad Balmer, director of the event.  While the club died out in the mid 60’s, a group of IUSB students helped the tradition continue on in the late 70’s. 

“We all met here at IUSB.  We met in the game room in Northside in the basement,” recalls Balmer.  “That was the spark to start the South Bend Club again.”

The club has been around ever since, shifting its location occasionally, as IUSB was one of the intermim locations.  The current club officially began in 1992 and has been going strong ever since. 

Also a part of the South Bend Club is Dan Semiller, who was recently named coach of the year. 

The future seems bright for the South Bend Club as well.  Joe Cochran, a 17 year old from the club is the current #1 player on the U.S. Junior team, and A.J. Brewer at 13 is the Men’s state champion on the junior cadet team.  “He’s a phenomenal player” said Schmucker. 

Publications on Campus: What Students Should Know

part one of two

Terrie Phillips
Student News Editor

 “But I don’t want comfort.  I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness, I want sin.” Aldous Huxley, Brave New World.  What does this quote and Talia Reed have in common, The Analecta. 

 Reed is the editor of the Analecta and the above quote is the theme for the submissions for this year’s issue.  The Analecta’s Graphic Designer is Katy Wright, Assistant editors are Vince Bauters and Rob White, and Faculty Advisor is Kelsey Parker.
 
 Reed said this year they had more submissions than in the past several years.  “About 50 students with 150 plus submissions,” said Reed. 

 Every year there is a different editor, which is chosen by the Publications Board.  “Every editor does it different,” said Reed.  They will be calling for applications for a editor for next year. 

 The Analecta accepts anything artistic for submissions; poetry, fiction, nonfiction, drama, artwork, screenplay, and a mixture of pros and poetry.  They do not accept formal essays.  This year they accepted five fiction, 20 poems, and 10 non-fiction.  They did not accept any drama or screen plays this year.

 The selections submitted to the Analecta also are submitted to the Wolfson Awards.  Every year they invite a published author to serve as the judge for the submissions.  This years judge will be John Gallaher; poet, co-editor of The Laurel Review, and he teaches in Mississippi.  He has published two books Gentlemen  in Turbans, Ladies in Cauls, and The Little Book of Guesses. 

 Winners of the Wolfson Awards will receive cash prizes and will be published.  The winners of this years Wolfson Awards will be announced on April 21, 2007, this is also when the Analecta will debut.  You can pick up a copy after this date in the English Department, third floor DW.  Analecta winners will be notified by email. 

 To get more information on Gallaher, you can visit his blog at www.jjgallaher.blogspot.com. 

Sexual Assault Awareness Month at IUSB

Jason Overholt
Staff Writer

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and Indiana University South Bend will host a documentary and poetry jam to acknowledge it.

On Friday, April 6, the Young Women’s Christian Association of St. Joseph County will team up with the IUSB Social Action Project, Women Studies, and the Black and Latino Student Unions to present the documentary No! by Aisha Shahidah Simmons. This will be followed by a poetry jam hosted by Slam Master Zorina Jerome. Both events are free, and will take place in Wiekamp Hall 1001 at 6 p.m.

“It’s important that we collaborate with community agencies,” said Dr. De’ Bryant, Associate Professor of Psychology and Director of the Social Action Project. “We want to expand education beyond the classroom walls. Not just look at theory and models, but at how people are dealing with real world problems.”

The documentary No! deals with violence against women in the African American community. The poetry jam will be open mike. It will feature music, songs and anything else poetic that deals with women’s issues. Zorina Jerome, the host, is an IUSB student who has just published her first book entitled “I Won’t Apologize for Being a Woman.”

This is the first collaboration between IUSB groups and the YWCA, but Bryant says that she doesn’t think it will be the last. The YWCA also strives to establish such partnerships.

“It takes everyone in our community working together to end sexual violence, not just sexual assault crisis intervention programs but everyone – faith communities, cultural organizations, professional organizations, schools, law enforcement agencies, hospitals and state attorney’s offices – all insisting that our community will not tolerate sexual violence,” said Linda Baechle, executive director of the YWCA of St. Joseph County.

The YWCA offers free individual and group sexual assault therapy in both English and Spanish to women who have suffered recent or past sexual assault. For more information on YWCA programs, or the upcoming IUSB event, call (574) 233-9491. Visit ywcasjc.org for a list of Sexual Awareness Month activities.

Women’s History Month Kick-Off: Table Talk

Terrie Phillips
Student News Editor

 Speakers Dr. Lisa Zwicker, Assistant Professor of History, Dr. Hayley Froysland, Assistant Professor of History, Dr. Lesley Walker, Associate Professor of French and Chair, World Language, and Dr. Elizabeth Bennion, Assistant Professor of Political Science, spoke at the Women’s History Month Table Talk on March 7, 2007. 

 Opening the table talk was April Lidinsky, Women’s Studies, beginning the talk were Zwicker.  She talked about Angela Merkel, Chancellor of Germany.  Zwicker told of Merkel’s biography, history, and her journey to gain such a high possession in Germany. 
 
 “Chancellor is the most powerful position,” said Zwicker.  Zwicker said Merkel is seen as the most powerful woman in the world at this time.  “Her [Merkel] approval rating is 85%,” said Zwicker.  Merkel grew up in communist Germany; she was the daughter of a protestant.  Her party is currently the Christian Democratic Party.  Merkel is currently the president of the European Council.

 To learn more about Merkel you can visit, http://www.nndb.com/people/057/000098760/.

 The next speaker, Walker, spoke on Segolene Royal, current candidate for French Presidency.  Walker, also, spoke of the biography, history, and journey Royal took to get in her position.  Royal is a member of the French Socialist party, she is center-right. There currently are eight people running for candidacy in France.  “The media loves her,” said Walker.   Royal is focusing her campaign on family, school, housing, and employment.  Royal was able to unseat prominent men for her current position.  Her father was a general and she went to ENA, Ecole nationale d’administration. 

 For more information on this school you can go to, http://www.ena.fr/accueil.php
 For more information on Royal, http://www.segoleneroyale.com/.  To translate these entire pages, you can use a free service such as translate.google.com. 

 The third speaker, Bennion, spoke on Hilary Clinton.  She gave a current standing on positions women hold in the government.  She gave a quick background to how women began getting involved with the government.  Bennion told of Clinton’s likelihood to be president and current statistics of the kind of person people would vote for. 

 “We are seeing some progress,” said Bennion.  She continued to talk about the image Clinton had while being First Lady, and the image she will have in the presidential candidacy.  Bennion spoke of how the image of a government official is frowned on when a woman acts the same way. 

 To learn more on Clinton you can visit, http://www.hillaryclinton.com/.

 The final speaker, Froysland, talked of Michelle Bachelet.  Bachelet is the current president of Chili.  Froysland spoke of Bachelet’s struggle during communist Chili.  She spoke of Bachelet’s past and of Chili’s change.  “Divorce was only legalized two years ago,” said Froysland.  Bachelet is the first woman leader in Latin America. 
 
 Bachelet is a member of the Socialist party.  Her father was a general, and her mother and she were both tortured.  Chili’s politics has shifted to the left.

 For more information on Bachelet you can visit, http://womenshistory.about.com/od/headsofstate20012010/p/bachelet_chile.htm.

 The four speakers spoke on four different women leaders in today’s society.  All of them overcoming some sort of obstacle to get where they are today.  March is Women’s History Month, the next event is scheduled for March 21, 2007, a Table Talk, it will be located in SAC rooms 223-225.